{"id":1549,"date":"2013-08-21T00:10:53","date_gmt":"2013-08-20T22:10:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/?p=1549"},"modified":"2013-08-21T00:15:13","modified_gmt":"2013-08-20T22:15:13","slug":"kr-need-for-food-underground","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/?p=1549","title":{"rendered":"KR &#8211; Need for Greed Underground"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/MG_0241.jpg\" alt=\"KR - Need for Food Underground\" title=\"KR - Need for Food Underground\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-1548\" srcset=\"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/MG_0241.jpg 800w, https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/MG_0241-300x199.jpg 300w, https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/MG_0241-642x427.jpg 642w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Kommissar Riemenschneider in Gefahr. <!--more--> Das grelle Licht enttarnt den Klops als lebendigen Fleischberg. Zu seiner Best\u00fcrzung musste der Kommissar feststellen, dass dieser Inbegriff von Adipositas v\u00f6llig angeschwollen auf seinem blauen Stuhl thront. Vom Gestank gar nicht zu sprechen.<\/p>\n<p>Pl\u00f6tzlich beginnt der Fettklops zu kr\u00e4chzen: \u201eHallo Herr Kommissar! Mein Name ist Georg Ingolf Armani. Meinen perversen Gehilfen Wasabi kennen Sie ja bereits.\u201c \u201eIn der Tat pervers!\u201c, unterbricht Wasabi. \u201eSchnauze! Wie dem auch sei, seien Sie willkommen in meinem bescheidenen Etablissement.\u201c <\/p>\n<p>\u201eDanke!\u201c, erwidert der Kommissar. \u201eIch dachte, ihr Gesch\u00e4ft w\u00e4ren Unterhosen.\u201c \u201eJa, so fing alles an. Als ich noch und knackig war, konnte ich mich gar nicht oft genug in Unterw\u00e4sche zeigen. Ich machte daraus einfach mein Gesch\u00e4ft. Dann passierte etwas Schreckliches. Eines Morgens zog ich mir einen viel zu engen Schl\u00fcpfer an, um noch knackiger auszusehen. Doch ich bekam ihn nicht mehr ausgezogen. Er schn\u00fcrte mir alles ab, mein K\u00f6rper lief komplett blau an, das Atmen fiel immer schwerer und aus mir wurde ein ekelerregendes H\u00e4ufchen Elend. Aus Frust fra\u00df ich alles in mich rein und bin jetzt der, den Sie vor sich sehen. Aber ich gab mich nie auf. Mein Imperium wuchs und wuchs, besonders nachdem ich den asiatischen Markt f\u00fcr meine viel zu kleinen Unterhosen entdeckte. Auch wenn ich die Strippen seither aus dem Untergrund ziehen muss, ist mein Name in aller Ohren.\u201c Ein \u00fcbertriebenes Lachen erf\u00fcllt den Raum.<\/p>\n<p>\u201eDas gibt Ihnen noch lange nicht das Recht, Ihre Drecksunterw\u00e4sche weiterhin zu verkaufen und so das Schicksal unbedarfter Europ\u00e4er zu gef\u00e4hrden\u201c, sagte Kommissar Riemenschneider erz\u00fcrnt, jedoch mit ruhiger Stimme. \u201eAm eigenen Leib musste ich die dem\u00fctigende Verf\u00e4rbung meines Genitalbereichs erfahren. Ich werde daf\u00fcr sorgen, dass Ihrem grausigen Treiben ein Ende gesetzt wird. Hier und jetzt!\u201c Schwei\u00dftropfen sammeln sich in den zahlreichen Speckfalten von Georg Ingolf Armani. <\/p>\n<hr style=\"height: 1px; color: #aaa;\" \/>\n<p>Commissioner Riemenschneider in danger. The dazzling light exposes the meatball as a living mountain of flesh. To his consternation, the Commissioner had to realise that this embodiment of obesity was enthroned on his blue stool. Not to talk about the smell.<\/p>\n<p>Suddenly, the meatball starts croaking: \u201cHello Mr Commissioner! My name is George Ingolf Armani. You\u2019ve already had the chance to meet my perverted assistant Wasabi.\u201d \u201cPerverted indeed!\u201d, Wasabi interrupts. \u201cShut up! Anyway, welcome to my humble establishment.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you, the Commissioner replies. I thought your business was underwear.\u201d \u201cYes, that\u2019s how it all started. When I was young and firm, I just couldn\u2019t present myself often enough in underwear. I just turned it into my business. Then, something terrible happened. One morning, I put on a way too tight panty to look even firmer. However, I couldn\u2019t put it off anymore. It choked off everything, my body turned entirely blue, breathing got harder and harder and I became a gross picture of misery. Out of frustration, I ate everything and you can see the result in front of you. But I never backed down. My empire grew and grew, especially after I had discovered the Asian market for my way to small underpants. Even when I have to pull the wires from the underground since that day, my name is in all ears.\u201d The room is fraught with exaggerated laughter.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThis still doesn\u2019t give you the right to continue selling your fucking underwear and thereby endangering the fate of ingenuous Europeans\u201d, Commissioner Riemenschneider said angered, yet with a calm voice. \u201cI had to learn the humiliating colour change of my genital area the hard way. I will make sure that your gruesome activities are put to an end. Here and now!\u201d Drops of sweat are gathering in George Ingolf Armani\u2019s numerous ham wrinkles.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Kommissar Riemenschneider in Gefahr.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1548,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[33],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1549"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1549"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1549\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1552,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1549\/revisions\/1552"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1548"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1549"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1549"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/supersushiwarriors.visitors-j.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1549"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}